Of all of the apostle's letters, I think few of them are soaked in as much affection as his First letter to the Thessalonians. Paul, writing this letter from a distance, seems to be almost sick with concern for the Thessalonians' faith and wellbeing. He writes of how he was encouraged and comforted by Timothy's report of their thriving faith in Christ and their love for one another. In chapter two, he writes to ensure the Thessalonians of the apostles' sincerity and authenticity, how they did not flatter the Thessalonians or try to greedily take advantage of them, and how they were sure their motives were pure in ministering to them. I love Paul's genuine affection for and interest in the Thessalonians in verse 8: "Because we loved you so much, we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well" (1 Thess. 2:8 NIV).
Paul's above assurances to the Thessalonians are cause for any ministering Christian's reflection. But he offers more to the ministering Christian's pastoral formation in 2:6-12, by way of metaphor.
Paul uses three family metaphors to convey the different attitudes and goals of the apostles' ministry. I think that you and me, as Christians in ministry, would benefit from letting Paul's metaphors inform how we relate to the people we serve, and how we formulate our goals in ministry.
1. "As young children among you." Paul assures the Thessalonians that, though he and the other apostles have authority from Christ to minister in the churches, they preferred to conduct themselves "like young children" among them. Before Paul is misunderstood: I'm not convinced he is saying that he determined to be shy, timid, or ignorant. I think we can gather at least two positive attitudes sometimes associated with young children: humility of status and cheerfulness.
Young children do not have authority to lord over their parents; they are of "humble status," so to speak. We who are ministering Christians would do well to remember that our authority in Christ is derivative of Christ, who is ultimately at work in our sphere of ministry service through our personal talents and affinities. I think that to act like a child in the sense of Paul's meaning is to recognize that we are not the head, but that Jesus is; after all, we minister in his name. Paul elsewhere names the apostles as "fools for Christ" and "the last of all." A self-important view of our authority in ministry undermines the very ministry we're trying to do. Let's be careful to treat people as image-of-God bearers, and not as commodities for accomplishing a goal or furthering an agenda.
Secondly, we ought to minister to people with cheerfulness, and not the superficial kind of cheerfulness that we sometimes powder on before our church gathering. How do we minister with cheerfulness? I think praying for affection and concern for the people God has given to our care is a crucial practice (1 Thess. 3:10). Living in the liberating grace that God has shown us in Christ reminds us that God loves us irrespective of ministry "success" or "failure." Getting to be instrumental in sharing and showing God's grace, love, and peace to people in our care is cheerful business.
2. "As a nursing mother cares for her children." By placing the apostles in the position of the nursing mother, Paul inverts the relational dynamics that he established in the previous metaphor between the apostles and the Thessalonian church. In his previous metaphor, the apostles are humble, simple, gentle, and cheerful like young children. But now, by identifying the apostles with the nursing mother, Paul places the apostles in a position of responsibility and authority (though that doesn't negate being humble, simple, gentle, and cheerful; it just adds another dimension to the image Paul is painting).
Ministering Christians have the responsibility to care for the people God has placed in their sphere, as tenderly and thoughtfully and consistently as a nursing mother cares for her infants.
3. "As a father deals with his own children." In verses 11 and 12, Paul identifies a father's role in the life of his children as "encouraging, comforting, and urging" them. Surely, this doesn't mean that mothers don't have the same responsibility toward their children, so what distinction could Paul be trying to make? As an illustrative example of how I understand it, fathers typically take their young boy or girl outside to play catch with a baseball, aiming to train them in or urge them toward proficiency in the sport. The father that Paul has in mind is not hard, unyielding, or ungracious, but is a father who encourages and comforts his children, even as he urges them toward proficiency.
We Christians in ministry should seek not only the spiritual stability and gospel fluency of the people for whom we humbly care, but their proficiency in practicing grace and service toward their neighbor, as we (imperfectly) model it for them as well.
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Lest we feel overwhelmed by our responsibility as Christians in ministry, Paul reminds us of God's faithfulness in bringing about the Christian change for which we hope: "The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it" (1 Thess. 5:23-24). That's a peace-bringing promise for the people in our care, and for ourselves as well.
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